It started off as International Idiot Day. People were ordering stuff at Pennants that weren't even on the menu, and I had to deal with countless moronic drivers on the road. Grr!

I saw my psychologist today. It was a really good session. I talked about how I've been rapidly cycling lately, and how I've managed to be able to channel all that energy into something positive and constructive, like my poetry, for example. I also am able to say to myself, for the first time, well, ever, that I AM WORTH IT. I am worth being treated with utmost respect, I am worth being cared about, I am worth being loved. And no one has the right to tell me otherwise. It took almost ending my life to get to this point, but I've always been able to bounce back from any setback, and I've bounced with a vengeance this time. I am really proud of myself for getting to this point. Like I said earlier, all the shit that went down with Amanda, I wouldn't go back and change, because it's made me who I am today. And I am a hell of a lot stronger having gone through all that. Therefore, I have to thank her for inadvertently changing my life for the better, forever.

Later, I dropped my sister off at her dance. I decided it would be the best opportunity to go see Cane, so that's exactly what I did. We watched "Pitch Black" on DVD. The special effects were cool, the acting was fine, and the cinematography was ok. But the script sucked! It would've been a fantastic movie if the script hadn't left much to be desired. OK, I'm going on my overly analytical kick here, but it's just something I noticed (that bugged the hell out of me).

Afterwards, Cane got invited to be a DD for a friend of his, so he started getting cleaned up to go. Unfortunately, I started rapidly cycling again. I really didn't want him to see me like that. I was saying shit that made absolutely no sense. I think I started talking about seeing penguins at the south pole or something equally stupid. Anyway, to my surprise, he didn't run away. He stayed right by me, insisting I let whatever thoughts running through my head (which obviously made no sense at all) out in the open. When I asked him why he's so good to me, he told me it's because he cares. And if he doesn't run away after seeing me cycle like that, then he's a keeper. Screw Diver Chris. Ok, I don't really mean that, but if he's going to pursue some other girl, then that's fine. I have someone here who cares about me a great deal, and tonight made me realize how much I care about him, too. He won't run away scared like Amanda did that night. He's going to stick right by me, which is exactly what I need right now. He promised not to abandon me. I hope to the gods he keeps that promise.

And for once, I can treasure what a good thing I've got. Why? Because I'M WORTH IT.