Where in the fuck should I even begin? Besides the obvious fact that I'm trying so damn hard to keep my life together, and nothing seems to be working...I guess I'll start with the investigation.

Don't worry, I'm not being investigated for anything. Rather, it stems from my complaint when I started realizing some shit going down with my bank account that I didn't authorize or know about in the first place. Let me start with what I discovered and work from there.

Back when I was visiting my parents in MI last month, I checked my bank account online and noticed a mysterious $50 charge. All it said was "WTS" and a 1-800 number. I didn't think much of it at the time, because I figured I'd charged something online and forgotten about it. But then I was getting overdraft notices from my bank for the same thing. Finally, I called the 1-800 number to find out what was going on. According to the lady over the phone, there were memberships to 2 porn sites started on Aug. 17 in Tony's name. I had her immediately cancel the memberships. Then I went to my bank and put a stop on my account so these website people can't take money from me ever again. I was furious; how could my husband do such a thing?

This happened on Tuesday, the 14th. Tony called me the next night. I asked him about it and explained what I knew. He said he seriously had no idea about any of it, he'd never heard of the websites in question, and was freaked out and pissed off about it. I told him I was going to have this investigated, and we started thinking about who could've been responsible for it. We realized Rob was at our house that weekend. Now, Rob's still got some stuff over here from when he was going to move in. Among his things is a porno mag. I decided to check out the sites and see if they were the same material as the magazine. Turns out all 3 were of teen girls. Therefore, I naturally suspected Rob.

I went back to my bank the following Monday to ask what needed to be done next. They said to get a police report and then they could start filing fraud paperwork for this. So I headed off to the MP station to do just that. After an hour and a half, I had given my statement, answered a bazillion questions, and was on my way. I met with the investigator in charge of my case on Friday and answered more questions. He told me he'd be questioning Rob sometime this week.

Today I picked up my report and went back to the bank to start filing paperwork. (Turns out there's probably a total of 4 charges involved: larceny, fraud, identity theft, and forgery.) When we start going through my transaction history, I discover that there was an earlier charge for the same amount by the same people using the same method on Aug. 12. I was told this started the 17th. Now I don't know what the fuck's going on. This whole thing is just getting weirder and more complicated by the minute, it seems.

Add to that the fact that the same week I called the 1-800 number I also got a call from OB/GYN. Apparently, my Pap smear from my last appointment came back abnormal. They told me it's mild dysplasia and I go back on the 3rd for a colposcopy so they can look at my cervix more closely. I was told that they'll check it once more during the pregnancy and again after I have the baby, and if things haven't cleared up by that point, they'll do a biopsy. Now I'm freaked out that I could end up with cervical cancer. I'm trying to remain calm and hope that it's nothing major, but I guess I'll find out at the appointment.

I also haven't heard from Tony in a week. Normally I get a call from him about twice a week, so this is making me worry as well. I want to ask him about my latest finding regarding my bank account, but I also want to make sure he's okay.

And my pregnancy weight gain has me freaked out, too. During the first trimester, I lost 5 lbs. from severe morning sickness. It's pretty much let up now, and I was hoping that since I'm eating more that I'd gained the 5 lbs. back. Today at my appt. I discovered that I've gained some weight in the past month...a whole half a pound. Why is it that when I'm actually supposed to gain weight it seems I can't? I just hope this doesn't affect my baby. I just want to have a healthy child, like any other parent.

Loki's been acting crazier than usual, which is also frustrating me. That's really just the tip of the iceberg, though.

I've gotten some good news lately, as well, so don't think I'm pulling an ex-Josh and focusing entirely on the doom and gloom:

*I was told at my last visit with Dr. Khan that I'm doing so well, I don't need to be on medication for the rest of my pregnancy, and not to come back to see him until after I have the baby unless an emergency arises. As long as I keep seeing Dr. Bodine, I'll do okay.

*My grandma is taking care of my flight reservations for my trip home to MI for the holidays.

*I found out Amtrak takes money orders, so now I know I can pay for my train ticket myself for my Thanksgiving trip home.

*I got to record the baby's heartbeat at my appointment today. Baby decided to be more cooperative than last time, so we got a good, strong one this time.

*I go for my ultrasound on the 17th. Maybe I can find out who's taking up residence in my uterus at the moment...

*I ran into Candy, a friend from high school that I hadn't seen in quite a while, at Guthrie today. Turns out she's also married to a soldier (who's in Tim's unit, actually) and her due date was Monday. She's hoping for a Halloween baby, and I wished her the best of luck.

*I finally managed to get ahold of Katie and she went with me to bingo tonight. Neither of us won anything, but it was nice to get out of the house and hang out with a friend. I have her cell phone number now, so hopefully we can do stuff more often.

I'm starting to feel a little better. A hug would be nice right about now, though. And a calmed-down kitty wouldn't hurt, either. I love Loki dearly, but sometimes I just wish he wouldn't be quite so hyperactive. I'm sure he'll grow out of it when he's a little older. Oh well, this is making me a mommy-in-training.

I'm having issues with my sciatic nerve now instead of constant nausea. I'm not sure which is better. Sometimes it hurts to move half an inch, and then I get pain shooting down my legs from my lower back. I just can't win.

Also, I got passed over for the job at the GAP. Not that big of a deal...based on others I've seen working there (Derek excluded), I don't think I'd like it there, anyway. Katie told me that Ritz Camera is hiring (that's where she works), so maybe I'll look into that. Cameras are more up my alley than preppy clothes, anyway.

I'm also getting annoyed that Brian, our videographer for the wedding, hasn't returned my call. Our copy of our wedding DVD has some sort of defect. It'll get to a certain part of the ceremony and then just stop working. I can't fast forward through it, either. The surface appears to be flawless; I didn't notice any scratches or dents or anything that could cause it to do that. I left a message with him last week and still haven't heard anything back. If I don't hear from him soon, I'll call back until I do get a rsponse.

We're finally getting cable installed on Monday. Now I can go back to watching "Golden Girls"! Yay!

Now my back is killing me, and I should get to bed because I have an appointment with Dr. Bodine in the afternoon. Maybe Loki will realize it's bedtime and will stop terrorizing my laundry basket...at any rate, it's sleepytime for me. More later.